Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Hitting does not equal Loving -- End Domestic Violence Abuse by talking with your kids. It's FREE

Stop another generation of abusers...

With October being Domestic Violence Month, I have posted information on organizations that help Domestic Violence survivors like Verizon HopeLine® and also the SAFE program.  A year ago, I was fortunate to become friends with Kalyn Risker, the founder of Sisters Acquiring Financial Empowerment (SAFE), an organization that helps domestic violence survivors earn a decent living by providing help with career mapping, resume writing, interviewing, employment rights, financial literacy, and entrepreneur skills.

Kalyn Risker is herself a domestic violence survivor. Kalyn was almost killed from a beating and had to undergo plastic surgery on her face. I know no one wants to hear about such ugly things in a blog post, but sometimes ugly just walks into your front door regardless of how hard you try to keep it out.

Two weeks ago, Kalyn's 15 year old daughter was attacked during an after school program at a vocational center. A boy she barely knew, who has been bullying her, came into a crowded classroom and hit her square in the face. When I learned about what happened, my spirit was vexed. We parents try so hard to keep our children safe. But we especially don't want something bad that happened to us to also happen to our kids. So when I learned what happened, I knew Kalyn had to be going through her own private anguish right along with her daughter.

The vocational center where this assault happened made Kalyn and her daughter meet with the alleged attacker and his father. The father supposedly indicated that his son hits girls as a way to express his interest. I will wait for you to reread that part again. Kalyn's daughter was allegedly hit because the boy was supposed to be interested in her. So what do you think the alleged attacker got as a punishment for this altercation? Would you believe a 2 day suspension from the vocational center? That's it folks.

I will now leave the matter with Kalyn's daughter alone since it will have to play itself out in our judicial system. But I will say that I was unaware that a punch in the face was the new and acceptable form of a love tap in our society.

Kalyn wanted her daughter's story to be told to educate us all that domestic violence is also a teen issue.

I started a long time ago teaching my son that girls and boys are different and that it is not acceptable to hit a girl. I am filling his head daily with the notion that women are to be treated with respect and kindness. It troubles me that some young men are thinking that love and violence are somehow connected. And it kills me to think that any girl or woman would think that being hit by a man is acceptable.

As Domestic Violence month draws to an end, it is apparent that more needs to be done. If you have a son, talk to him about this issue. Also talk about it with the friends of your kids. Let's do what we can to help put a stop to yet another generation of abusers.  Talking with our kids is FREE...

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